11.25.2009

Countdown to 2010

Long time, no write. Well, I've actually been doing a lot of writing and a lot of reading, just on the subject involving our health system and proposed changes. I have come to the conclusion there is a direct correlation between my stress and blood pressure levels and how much time I spend thinking about health care so for my own sanity I'm taking a little break.

I'm stuck in the thirty-third year of my life wondering where to go from here. It's all very monotonous: Wake up, get ready, drive 45+ minutes to work. Run around frantically trying to meet deadlines, and if I'm lucky leave by 6pm. Drive another 45+ minutes back home, eat dinner, and then try to relax enough so I can fall asleep despite being in pain & discomfort. The next day it all starts again. Half of the weekends I end up either sick and trying to recover so I can function come Monday, or I'm at work - yes, you guessed it - working. The other half I'm trying to get done all of those personal things that need to be taken care of, though I tend to put more priority on work than what I'd like to accomplish personally. It's a sad statement, but in a time with record-high unemployment and no end in site, I feel I have to dedicate a significant portion of my life to my job. I'm grateful for the paycheck and quite frankly don't want to lose it. Now is not the time to start developing a "life balance." Or is it?

I see a portion of the path that I want to go down in life, but I'm not entirely sure how to get to it. And if I'm honest, some things I know I have to do seem overwhelming and I wonder where I'll find the time or - most importantly - the energy, as pain related to health matters is still an issue. If I think back to the days where I was a Franklin Covey disciple, I should get out a piece of paper, write down the big goals and then break them up into little, doable, manageable tasks with priorities and deadlines. The system has worked before; maybe I need to get back into that mindset.

The holiday season officially kicks off tomorrow, so there is not much time left of 2009. My goal is to get as much relaxation in as possible. Not rest, but relaxation. The husband & I have three road trips planned, and while there will be down time it will also be relaxing and fun. Along the way we'll see friends and family, many whom we have not seen in a few years. It's all about enjoying the time, reconnecting, and refreshing. I want to start 2010 with a new perspective and hopefully a renewed spirit.